The Smudger Read online

  “You must’ve been young when that happened. What is it, ten years ago now?”

  “Eleven. I was eight years old.”

  “That must’ve been… I can’t even imagine.”

  “I was away at the time. A whole bunch of us were on a trip to the Iwoyo colony with our rooks when it happened. We knew nothing about it at all until we returned late that evening. We thought we were going home, but we returned to a graveyard. The whole place had been burnt to the ground. Everyone and everything was destroyed. How can anyone imagine anything so devastating? It took me ages to even believe it had happened. I mean, tragedies are something that happen to other people, right?”

  “What did you do?”

  “Once the rooks had established no one was alive, we stayed long enough for them to bury the bodies, and then we set off for Kagosaka, our sister colony. Their brood mother became our brood mother.”

  “But you don’t live there anymore?”

  I shook my head. “It was meant to be our new home, but it never was. We were never accepted there, always thought of as outsiders. They used to make cuckoo noises at us. When you hear that every single day for eight years, it really starts to get to you. The brood mother did nothing, just ignored it. The rooks there? They joined in. The rooks from Okaporo weren’t meant to be teaching anymore, but they used to teach us after dark, in secret, because we weren’t getting the proper training. Kagosaka was never home.”

  “Do you think you’ll ever belong to another colony?”

  “I doubt it. Kagosaka kind of put me off ever trying anywhere else.”

  “I can understand that.”

  “After all, an important part of colony life is drawing from the wisdom of your ancestors. Mine are all still in Okaporo, buried under the scorched earth.”

  “Have you ever been back?”

  I shook my head. “I’ve not even seen the sea. I’ve stayed as far away from the coast as possible. In Kagosaka, there was one place that when the wind blew in the right direction I could smell the salt, even taste it some days. I spent a lot of time sat there, pining for Okaporo. But when I left Kagosaka, I turned my back to it all. I had to make a clean break.”

  “And now we’re headed for Honporo. Right on the ocean.”

  “Now we’re headed for Honporo.”

  “What are you going to do after we’ve delivered this job?”

  I looked over to where Malia still slept. “Get her emptied. I’m hoping someone in the colony there can help me. She’s so full I can’t do it without risking a rush.”

  “Why’s she so important?”

  I looked at him.

  “I’m sorry,” he said. “I know you don’t want to say.”

  “Because she’s got a memory from my little sister.”

  “You’ve got a sister?”

  “I had a sister. She died in the massacre. At least, I thought she did, along with my parents. But the glimpse of the memory I saw when Malia touched me suggests that they got away. They might even still be alive.”

  Tian stared at me, his mouth flapping open without any words to say.

  “I know,” I said, rescuing him. “It may well be that the last eleven years of my life have been a complete lie. What if more people escaped? What if we were sent away purposefully? If that’s even halfway true it would mean that our brood mother, Narata, knew it was going to happen. And if that’s true, then she had the chance to save everyone, but chose not to. Wow, it sounds even worse when I say it out loud. It’s just...” I banged my head with the heel of my hand. “It’s too much to be wondering about. I need to know for sure.”

  Tian looked over at Malia. “Now it makes sense. I didn’t think you were that kind of person.”

  “What kind of person.”

  “The kind to kill another trader.”

  “What are you talking about?”

  “Using the smudger as a weapon.”

  “Seriously, what are you talking about?”

  Tian shrugged. “It’s just something I’ve heard some of the merchants saying. That traders are buying up smudgers to use as weapons to kill other traders with.”

  I looked over at Malia. “Forcing a rush onto them.”

  “I don’t know if it’s true, but it’s what some people say.”

  I shook my head. “I can’t believe that. Because, if you kill a trader with a rush, you’re not just killing them, you’re condemning their soul to eternal unrest. No trader would do that to one of their own.”

  “It’s amazing what some people might do.”

  I shook my head again. “No. I can’t believe that.”

  “I’m sure you’re right.”

  I looked back at Malia. She was sleeping soundly at last, the shivers subsiding. Maybe if a brood mother could condemn most of her colony to death, then a trader really could be that depraved. I dragged my fingers back through my hair.

  “This is just too many revelations in just a few days.”

  Tian took hold of my hand. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said anything.”

  “You didn’t know that I was completely clueless.”

  “You’re not completely clueless.”

  It certainly felt like it. People had been lying to me for years, and I couldn’t stop running through my head everything anyone had said about Okaporo, my family, Narata, searching for evidence. Just the tiniest clue. It felt like my brain was on fire.

  Tian shifted across closer to me. “Sorry. Tonight was meant to be fun.”

  I smiled at him. “Actually, it has been kind of fun. I can’t even tell you the last time I talked to someone. I mean really talked to someone. And had them actually listen.”

  He squeezed my hand. “I’m glad I could be that person for you.”

  “Who would’ve thought it would be a merchant?”

  “Like you said; I’m only playing at being a merchant. I’ve got trader blood. You shouldn’t be so quick to judge people.”

  “Keeping my distance from rogues and being suspicious of you guys is what’s kept me alive. I can only judge people based on my own experience, and my experience of both rogues and merchants has been pretty crap. I do what I have to.”

  “I guess we all do.”

  He took hold of my other hand, and I felt the tingling run all the way up my arm. I closed my eyes as his lips pressed hard against mine.

  23

  SENETSU

  I smoothed down Omori’s hair. She had no idea what had just happened, and she wouldn’t know any different when she woke either. Life would be normal, she just wouldn’t know that she ever had a sister. We’d have to be careful not to mention Kioto’s name in front of her.

  “Thank you so much, Hama,” Saji said, giving the Akimori trader a tight hug.

  “I saw something when I was in her head.” Hama looked from Saji to me, and back again. “She’s… she’s a vessel, isn’t she?”

  Saji nodded. “That’s kind of how we ended up here.”

  “So you have to keep those memories safe for us,” I said. “We’ll need them back for her to be trained. You know how important it is that she’s trained up.”

  Hama nodded. “Sure, I mean the ability to be able to offload the memories we’re carrying into a vessel is vital for the continuation of the colonies. It’s fine for those merchants, offloading their extracted memories into their poor slaves, but we have to be more careful. We can only extract memories we know that we can sell, and sell quickly before we risk the shivers. To have a vessel means we can do so much more. We can actually compete with the merchants.”

  “And Omori isn’t affected either,” added Saji. “Those memories just pour straight out of her and into the ground.”

  “Is she staying here? In Akimori?” Hama asked.

  “No, we’re headed to Kumonayo. They’re expecting us. Narata told us we’d be safe there.”

  Hama frowned. “Kumonayo? You’re sure? I think she’d be far better protected in Akimori. Those hills around Kumonayo are crawlin
g with rogues.”

  “But no one knows that we’re here. And no one knows what Omori is. Except us, and now you.”

  “There’s been a lot of whispers that a vessel was born, even all the way out here. And the Okaporo massacre just proves it, and proves where she was born.”

  “So everyone thinks she’s dead.”

  “You know how whispers are. Even when there’s irrefutable proof there are still people who will deny it. There’s always some kind of conspiracy theory. But with the lack of any identifiable bodies in Okaporo, the rumours are rife. Lots of people say the vessel made it out alive. And the hills there whisper more than anywhere else. You’ll see what I mean when you get to Kumonayo.”

  “Narata said we’d be safe there. We trust her.”

  Hama shrugged. “I doubt you’re safe anywhere. But Kumonayo, there’s a lot of talk about the brood mother there, Tokai. There’s talk that she’s in with both the rogues and the merchants.”

  “But there’s always talk like that.”

  “Well, I’m only saying what I’ve heard. And I’ve been there. There’s a lot of money in that colony, and very little explanation as to where it comes from. Go if you must, but I wouldn’t trust Tokai.”

  “Thank you for the warning. We’ll watch ourselves.” Saji glanced over at me, his face full of worry.

  “Come to Akimori, we can look after you there. You’ll be much safer.”

  “We need to stick to the original plan,” I said. “There’s been too much upheaval already.”

  Hama snatched up her ceremony items and stuffed them back into her bag. “Well, whatever. Just watch your backs, that’s all I’m saying. You can’t trust a Kumonayo trader, everyone knows that.”

  She slammed the door behind her as she left.

  24

  KIOTO

  My eyes flicked open, and it took a moment for me to remember where I was. I lifted Tian’s arm off me and sat up. What had woken me?

  Then it came again.

  “They’re coming! They’re coming to get you!”

  I spun around. Malia was hopping from foot to foot, her face covered in scratches again.

  “They’re coming for you. For you. Now. There’s no time. They’re coming, they’re coming!”

  I shook Tian awake. He looked up at me with bleary eyes.

  “What?” he mumbled.

  “I think the rogues are on their way.”

  “What?” he said again.

  I pointed at Malia.

  “It’s just the shivers. Some memory she’s playing.”

  “But she never wakes up with the shivers.”

  He patted my hand. “She’s going to get worse. You know that.”

  “I dunno, Tian. Something just tells me we need to go. And I always trust my gut.”

  I started packing everything away into my bag.

  “Does this mean we don’t get breakfast?” Tian asked, packing his own things.

  “Not right now, no.”

  I grabbed Malia and dragged her from the barn. I quickly scanned the landscape around us, and headed for the highest spot I could see. Tian trailed behind, picking up things he dropped along the way while simultaneously pulling on his coat. He clearly wasn’t used to such a rushed exit. I, however, was quite used to them.

  I pushed Malia up ahead of me, and she was still shouting “They’re coming for you! They’re coming! Go now! Go now! Go!”

  “Can’t you get her to be quiet?” Tian panted behind me.

  “What do you want me to do, gag her?”

  “I don’t know, just something. Because if your gut is right, she’s going to lead those rogues right to us.”

  “I thought rogues were nice. I thought I just judged them too quickly.”

  “When they’re ones that we know are after us because they know we’re carrying something valuable, with rogues like that, I’m not willing to find out whether they’re nice or not. I’m going to make a snap judgement on that.”

  At the top of the hill, I huddled behind an outcrop of rocks, pulling Malia down to the ground with me. I took hold of her face in my hands, and turned her towards me.

  “It’s ok, we’ve got away, we’re safe now. But you need to be quiet. Can you do that?”

  “They’re coming,” she whispered. “They’re coming.”

  “I know they are, but that’s good, just keep quiet.”

  I turned to Tian. “Do you hear that?” I whispered.

  He listened. “Engines,” he confirmed.

  “She was right.”

  “As was your gut.”

  From where we were, we watched five bikes run through the valley below, passing right next to the barn we’d been sleeping in. They stopped, and one of them looked inside. And then they circled back the way they’d come.

  “That’s how close it was,” I said.

  I reached out and took hold of Malia’s hand. She was shaking her head violently, and the motion was passing down through her whole body.

  “She’s not good,” I said. “We really need to get to Honporo.”

  Tian pulled up a screen. “And there aren’t any more colonies along the way to stop at for help.”

  “I know. I’m going to have to do it myself. Just try to take some of the memories.”

  “You can’t, you know what will happen.”

  I nodded. “A rush. It’s a risk, but it’s not a certainty. Maybe if I’m just really careful.”

  “Her head is like an overfilled balloon. You don’t take a pin and start prodding at it just to let a bit of the air out, do you?”

  “I have to do something.”

  “We’ll just have to get Honporo quicker.”

  “Yeah sure, I’ll just get my auto car out of my bag, shall I?”

  Tian thought for a moment. “We’ll walk to the town and try to get a bus.”

  “One problem.” I pushed back my hair and pointed at my scars. “No bus will take me. And they’re unlikely to take Malia either.”

  “Can’t you wear a hat, or a hood, or something to cover them?”

  I stood up and turned around. “It’s not just my scars that mark me out as a trader. My clothes, my hair, the colour of my skin. They don’t need to see the scars to reject me. What if you take Malia. If you give her a sleeping pill she’ll keep quiet. Take her to the colony.”

  “And they’ll help me will they? A merchant turning up with a topped out smudger asking for help?”

  I grunted. “No. Of course they won’t.”

  “Then we just need to cover as much ground as we can as quickly as we can.” He stood up and hitched his bag onto his shoulders. “Let’s get going.”

  25

  KIOTO

  We walked almost solidly until dusk, making only quick stops to eat.

  “Why didn’t you buy proper supplies?” I snapped at Tian. “I am so sick of popcorn.”

  “Next time you can write me a shopping list. I wasn’t exactly planning on some kind of extreme survivalist experience.”

  “Out here you should be prepared for anything.”

  “This isn’t exactly normal for me.”

  “I’m so sorry that I can’t offer you a golden palace out in the middle of sodding nowhere, your highness.” I was tired, and fed up, and I could hear myself being completely unreasonable, but I couldn’t stop. And it was easy to take it out on Tian. “We need to find somewhere for the night. I need sleep, and Malia definitely does.”

  Her shivers had got significantly worse, and even walking had become difficult against the constant flurry of ticks. I didn’t know how much longer she could survive them, but she seemed to be strong willed and determined. That would certainly help her.

  Scanning the horizon, there was no sign of any barns. The land here was dry, flat, and rocky. There were no farms because nothing could grow out here. You couldn’t even graze animals.

  “I think our only hope is to look for some kind of cave,” Tian said. His voice had lost its usual edge of humour.
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  “You’re probably right.”

  We trailed around the area for some time, doubling back on ourselves, walking in circles, before we finally found a formation of rocks that offered up a shallow cave. We were too exhausted to look for anywhere better, and the sun had already disappeared below the flat horizon.

  I ducked inside the cave and unclipped my bed roll from my bag. I laid it out and guided Malia to it. She sat, but my efforts to encourage her to lie down were met with desperate scrabbling and wide, panicked eyes.

  “No, no!” Malia screamed, her voice echoing around the rocks. “You’ll kill her! She can’t breathe!”

  “You have to quieten her,” Tian hissed, searching through his bag. “I’ll get the sleeping pills.”

  “Ssshhh, ssshhh.” I tried to soothe her. I cuddled her close, stroked her hair, but everything I did seemed to intensify her shivers even more. She writhed in my arms, screaming and howling. I let go of her and she crawled onto my bed roll, her shouts subsiding into whimpers and groans.

  I looked at Tian and we sat in silence, listening. I’d never heard such silence before. There were no plants moving in the wind, no scratching of nocturnal animals, no chirping of crickets, or calling of birds settling into their roosts for the night. There was nothing but our breathing. And then we both heard it. The sound of engines.

  “We need to go,” I whispered.

  “No,” replied Tian. “You need to go. You and Malia. I’ll lead them off, give you a head start.”

  “What are you on about? We both need to go.”

  “The rogues don’t want me.”

  “They want what’s in your head.”

  Tian winked. “Only if it is in my head.”

  “What?”

  “Take my half of the scratch. Take it to the delivery and get my share of the money. Then get Malia the help that you need.”

  “And what about you?”

  “I’m just a guy out in the wilderness. Nothing even marks me out as a merchant. They have absolutely no need for me. Once they find nothing of worth in my head, they’ll let me go. What reason do they have to keep me?”